How to mend a relationship with a parent
The identical twin sisters Olwethu and Owami Siko recently mended their relationship with their biological mother, Vuyiswa. During the reality TV series Twice As Bold Season 1, the Siko twins explained that they were troubled that they could not call Vuyiswa their mother, because she had abandoned them when they were children.
The twins longed to better their relationship with her.
We look at what they did to improve their relationship with their biological mother. Here are five lessons we learned from the Siko twins:
1. They communicated what the problem areas were
The twin sisters have shown on the TV show that it is important to talk about what bothers you. Don’t assume the parent knows what it is they did to hurt you.
2. A mediator was brought in
The twins got very emotional with their biological mother, and they couldn’t seem to stay away from attacking her (verbalizing their anger). They then decided to rope in a third-party (firstly an aunt and then their brother) to be present as a mediator.
3. Bring in help or support
The sisters got counseling for themselves first, and then also asked their mother to join them for a session with a psychologist.
4. Set realistic expectations
Olwethu and Owani had to accept that each of them has differences. Don’t expect your parent to move mountains for you – meet them where they are.
5. Allow them into your world
We saw how the Siko twins first invited their mother, Vuyiswa, for lunch with them and their daughters. Shortly after they went for counselling together, they took their mother with them to do activities they enjoyed doing, such as hiking and a spa date.